Response to Janelle's Story

The Truth Behind the Window seems to center on the unfulfilling nature of suburban life. Though Christina responds to her husband’s verbal abuse and overly harsh criticism by similarly passing judgment on her neighbors, she shows a certain amount of self awareness absent in the people around her, recognizing that their way of life is flawed.

I like the use of the window. It emphasizes Christina’s separation from the people she is watching. It also forms a prison of sorts; just as it shields Christina from her neighbors, it traps her inside the house with her husband.  I really liked the characterization of Elizabeth. Her expectation that the bike would move for her was great. Christina is an interesting protagonist. She is not particularly likeable, but it is difficult to not feel sympathy for her. Her role as disinterested observer in the story was unusual, too, and it really complemented the sense of disillusionment and detachment in the piece.

There were a couple of mechanical problems. I noticed that you switched the point of view from third person to first at one point, and there were a few punctuation errors. I also saw a few tense changes.

            I have a difficult time engaging with Christina. Even though she is a victim of her husband, her observation of her neighbors seems almost capricious and voyeuristic, especially since she refuses to help anyone. She also does not change much throughout the story. It might be interesting to make her less sympathetic as the story progresses.

I think some more characterization would help. It seems like the characters are both perpetuators and victims of the suburban lifestyle, but it is often difficult to see them other than just bad people. Why did Christina marry Theo? Was he ever kind to her? Does he think that he is doing Christina a favor by being so harsh, or does he take malicious pleasure out of it?

There is also a lot of summary. Whenever you used dialogue, I got a pretty good sense of the characters’ relationship, so I think interaction would be better than just description and explanation.