Response to "From Me to You"

“From Me to You” describes a Thanksgiving dinner that occurs the day of the narrator’s uncle’s death. It deals with how families react to loss.

I like how the sour smell of menudo reflects the embittered holiday. There are many details that make this story believable, such as Debbie’s nose stabbing into the narrator’s shoulder, the yellowness of her teeth, the simplicity of Debbie’s and Albert’s wedding, and the fact that Albert was an overweight car salesman. Even outside of the central conflict, the world in your story is an imperfect place. You also give the right amount of detail. Centering the wedding around the cake, the dress, and the narrator’s dance with Debbie gave us an understanding without being overwhelming.

In a broader sense, you do a good job of conveying a sense of disorder and unhappiness. The focus on garbage and the sour smell of food is particularly effective. I really liked the ending. The parallel between Debbie’s teeth when she smiles and her teeth in the end is very effective.

The narrator did not feel like the main character. It seems like Debbie experienced the most change; the narrator, while upset about Albert’s death, doesn’t act much throughout the story. I think that most people would intervene if they saw a family member have a breakdown like Debbie’s, particularly when she wore her wedding dress to the dinner table. Though you integrate your summary and scene well, sometimes it feels like you are telling us too much. For example, when the narrator says that, “my father should be singing one of his stupid ditties,” I would like to see what he is doing instead. How does the family react on an individual basis to Albert’s death?